Today was the final day of our second module of yoga teacher training—I can't believe I made it through without completely killing my knees! That's awesome. Although I know practicing this week set me back in the progress I had made in healing my knees, at least they aren't worse.
God, what can I say about teacher training that would adequately capture the spirit of the class and the people in it? It's a profound experience to face your fears and actually feel progress in overcoming them. It feels incredible when you're able to nail two or three asanas you weren't previously able to achieve. It's awesome when you're able to remember more Sanskrit names, when you can chant in Sanskrit even when you can't hold a tune, when you can OM in a room full of people and not be afraid to hear only the sound of your voice.
And the people. The people! We come in as strangers and leave as friends. Real friends. There is safety, a bond, a camaraderie that lifts your heart and makes you feel like there's nothing you can't achieve. It's the most nurturing environment I've ever been in, and it's all because of one special, illuminated soul: Dolly. I tell you, when you have yoga, when you have the kind of atmosphere and spirit Dolly creates, you open up and find yourself more real, more raw than you have in years. I'm always so surprised when I find myself in tears in class (though I should be used to it by now)—but something about the energy in the room just sort of forces all these emotions in me to the surface and I physically cannot hold them back. Before we left today, Dolly gave each of us a huge hug and kiss on the cheek, and I just wept because, I told her, I knew I was going to have to go back to my life, and I didn't want to. After being in such a safe environment for six days, where you can do virtually no wrong, it's scary to think about going back home, dealing with reality, with bills and broken relationships and baggage.
As I come out of this cocoon, at least I know that I have done my best, that I am a little less afraid of teaching, that I have put myself out there and survived, and am stronger for it. And that I always have my yoga. When things get tough, I know I can get on my mat and flow and reconnect to the real me. And in the end, that is all I have that I can truly call my own.
Showing posts with label module 2. Show all posts
Showing posts with label module 2. Show all posts
Tuesday, May 1, 2007
Monday, April 30, 2007
Yoga Teacher Training, Day 5, Module 2
I don't know but I've been told,
I don't know but I've been told,
Yoga is good for your soul,
Yoga is good for your soul,
Sound off,
Sound off,
1,2,
1,2,
3,4,
3,4,
1,2,3,4,
1,2,3,4!
Now how does that made-up yoga marching drill fit into to our class today? I'll tell ya. I was the drill sergeant, and my classmates were the unfortunate victims of my five-minute yoga bootcamp! That was one of the "chants" we sang call-and-response style during my five minutes of ruling the world as a domineering drill sergeant. (I know, I know...for those of you that know me, it really isn't a far stretch! I've been accused of being Ms. Bossy Britches more than once.)
Anyway. I'm sure you're thinking, Yoga bootcamp? What the hell? So here's how it all went down...
To make a point about the importance of vibrancy and personality in teaching, Dolly had all of us teach a five minute segment of class as anyone but ourselves. We could be a bigger, louder version of ourselves, or some other character completely. All we had to do was focus on being the personality while teaching whatever asanas came to our heads. The sequence or screwing up didn't matter. Dolly called us up at random and we had to work with the students in whatever position they were in when the person before you finished.
It was a terrifying, wild, hysterical experience! We had an Aussie explorer and a Scotsman, a Rastafarian and a valley girl, a hippie, a girl with multiple personalities, a New Yorka, and more. Even though I am totally not an actress and not into being the center of attention, there was a certain sense of freedom in being able to teach as someone else. I was scared sh*tless, but I have to admit that it was kind of fun being able to scream at everyone and order them around like a drill sergeant! Drop and give me a chaturanga, people! It was an interesting exercise, to say the least. I think we all got a lot of insight into the "performance" aspect of teaching.
Practicing at the Wall
For our group practice, we worked at the wall for an hour and a half. Dolly showed us shoulder openers and ways to do Triangle, Half Moon, and several other asanas at the wall to allow deeper stretches, openings, and twists. It enabled us to see how with a small class, or with beginners, for example, you could leverage the wall to allow them to really feel a posture without having to focus on balancing. It was also great because I'm sure I wasn't the only one super sore in the lower back from working on Forearm Balances and Scorpion. Working at the wall was still a challenge, but at least it wasn't the typical highly active Power Vinyasa practice. I don't think I could've mustered another Up Dog even if someone paid me to do it.
Don't judge a book by its cover...will I ever learn this?
Today we read a homework assignment in which we were supposed to write a paper from our 85-year-old selves to ourselves now. Many of the papers were tear-jerkers, and I was completely taken aback by the eloquence of Melody's paper. I just never expected to hear such great writing and storytelling from her, such depth and emotion. This is not the first misinterpretation about a person I've had this week. I've gotten to know Adrienne a little bit, and the more I talked to her, the more surprised I was to find that my original impression of her was totally, completely off. But I never would have known if I hadn't taken the opportunity to get to know her, to begin to scratch the surface of who Adrienne is.
I definitely have a tendency to make snap judgements about people and based on my perception, and often dismiss the thought of even getting to know them. Now I see why I have so few friends. Instead of looking for 100% like-minded people, or basing my level of interest in a person on the way they look, I should be more open to getting to know others and appreciating their individual personalities. At minimum, I should at least work on opening myself up to the idea that so many people have something to offer. This is yoga off the mat—this soul searching, this dissection of oneself. It might take months or years, but yoga really does seep into your life in the best ways if you just let it. I think that in the long run, I'll be a less judgmental, more compassionate, connected person because of yoga.
PS: Snaps from today at lunch...we've been blessed with glorious weather so we've been lunching on the lawn outside the studio.
Kelley and Juliana
(with an empty Camille's pastry bag after our cookie run!)
Adriennne
Marcia and me
I don't know but I've been told,
Yoga is good for your soul,
Yoga is good for your soul,
Sound off,
Sound off,
1,2,
1,2,
3,4,
3,4,
1,2,3,4,
1,2,3,4!
Now how does that made-up yoga marching drill fit into to our class today? I'll tell ya. I was the drill sergeant, and my classmates were the unfortunate victims of my five-minute yoga bootcamp! That was one of the "chants" we sang call-and-response style during my five minutes of ruling the world as a domineering drill sergeant. (I know, I know...for those of you that know me, it really isn't a far stretch! I've been accused of being Ms. Bossy Britches more than once.)
Anyway. I'm sure you're thinking, Yoga bootcamp? What the hell? So here's how it all went down...
To make a point about the importance of vibrancy and personality in teaching, Dolly had all of us teach a five minute segment of class as anyone but ourselves. We could be a bigger, louder version of ourselves, or some other character completely. All we had to do was focus on being the personality while teaching whatever asanas came to our heads. The sequence or screwing up didn't matter. Dolly called us up at random and we had to work with the students in whatever position they were in when the person before you finished.
It was a terrifying, wild, hysterical experience! We had an Aussie explorer and a Scotsman, a Rastafarian and a valley girl, a hippie, a girl with multiple personalities, a New Yorka, and more. Even though I am totally not an actress and not into being the center of attention, there was a certain sense of freedom in being able to teach as someone else. I was scared sh*tless, but I have to admit that it was kind of fun being able to scream at everyone and order them around like a drill sergeant! Drop and give me a chaturanga, people! It was an interesting exercise, to say the least. I think we all got a lot of insight into the "performance" aspect of teaching.
Practicing at the Wall
For our group practice, we worked at the wall for an hour and a half. Dolly showed us shoulder openers and ways to do Triangle, Half Moon, and several other asanas at the wall to allow deeper stretches, openings, and twists. It enabled us to see how with a small class, or with beginners, for example, you could leverage the wall to allow them to really feel a posture without having to focus on balancing. It was also great because I'm sure I wasn't the only one super sore in the lower back from working on Forearm Balances and Scorpion. Working at the wall was still a challenge, but at least it wasn't the typical highly active Power Vinyasa practice. I don't think I could've mustered another Up Dog even if someone paid me to do it.
Don't judge a book by its cover...will I ever learn this?
Today we read a homework assignment in which we were supposed to write a paper from our 85-year-old selves to ourselves now. Many of the papers were tear-jerkers, and I was completely taken aback by the eloquence of Melody's paper. I just never expected to hear such great writing and storytelling from her, such depth and emotion. This is not the first misinterpretation about a person I've had this week. I've gotten to know Adrienne a little bit, and the more I talked to her, the more surprised I was to find that my original impression of her was totally, completely off. But I never would have known if I hadn't taken the opportunity to get to know her, to begin to scratch the surface of who Adrienne is.
I definitely have a tendency to make snap judgements about people and based on my perception, and often dismiss the thought of even getting to know them. Now I see why I have so few friends. Instead of looking for 100% like-minded people, or basing my level of interest in a person on the way they look, I should be more open to getting to know others and appreciating their individual personalities. At minimum, I should at least work on opening myself up to the idea that so many people have something to offer. This is yoga off the mat—this soul searching, this dissection of oneself. It might take months or years, but yoga really does seep into your life in the best ways if you just let it. I think that in the long run, I'll be a less judgmental, more compassionate, connected person because of yoga.
PS: Snaps from today at lunch...we've been blessed with glorious weather so we've been lunching on the lawn outside the studio.
Marge and Rashida
Kelley and Juliana
(with an empty Camille's pastry bag after our cookie run!)
Adriennne
Marcia and me
Sunday, April 29, 2007
Yoga Teacher Training, Day 4, Module 2
Today was another totally fun day in class. We worked on inversions (see list below for links to photos) and even though I can't do any of them away from the wall at this point, I'm totally fascinated by them. I've gone from a complete lack of confidence (even lack of belief) that I could ever even muster the courage and strength to do handstand at the wall to being able to confidently flip up. For me, that's huge. I used to really hate inversions and arm balances, but for some reason now, I'm obsessed with nailing them. And I'm starting to feel a little more control, a little more knowledge about the amount of momentum I need to get my legs up over my head without going all the way over.
Today, we worked on:
- Handstand Adho Mukha Vrksasana)
- Supported Headstand (Salamba Sirsasana)
- Forearm Balance (Pincha Mayurasana)
- Scorpion (Vrschikasana)
Inversions are tough for most people because the not only require some decent upper body strength, they also require mental fortitude. Being upside down and off balance is a pretty scary thing, especially when your face is inches from the ground. Pincha Mayurasana is an especially difficult and frightening inversion for beginners, so Dolly showed us how to safely roll out of Pincha Mayurasana if we feel like we're about to go over. Check out how she does this in the video below. Greg also gave it a whirl, with Dolly's assistance.
Dolly Demos Forearm Balance Roll Out on Vimeo
Greg's Forearm Balance Rollout on Vimeo
Saturday, April 28, 2007
Yoga Teacher Training, Day 3, Module 2
Wooo hooo! ARM BALANCES!!!!
Damn, my knees are sore, my wrists are sore, and my elbows are sore, but focusing on arm balances today was so much fun. We worked on Crow, Mountain Climber (see video below), Firefly, a half Crow/half Firefly posture and several others as well. I managed Firefly for the first time, then Mountain Climber on my own at home after class. So cool...it just made my night!
I'm spent...but here are a couple videos of Dolly's mad skills...she's really something else:
Dolly Demos Mountain Climber on Vimeo
Dolly Demos Full Locust on Vimeo
Damn, my knees are sore, my wrists are sore, and my elbows are sore, but focusing on arm balances today was so much fun. We worked on Crow, Mountain Climber (see video below), Firefly, a half Crow/half Firefly posture and several others as well. I managed Firefly for the first time, then Mountain Climber on my own at home after class. So cool...it just made my night!
I'm spent...but here are a couple videos of Dolly's mad skills...she's really something else:
Dolly Demos Mountain Climber on Vimeo
Dolly Demos Full Locust on Vimeo
Friday, April 27, 2007
Yoga Teacher Training, Day 2, Module 2
I have to admit that every day that I show up to teacher training and am told I'm going to have to teach, I silently wish I was anywhere else in the world but in that classroom. Not because I don't love what I get from the class and from Dolly—the classes and her teachings, guidance, examples, and ideas are phenomenal. My yoga practice is forever changed (for the better, I hope) as a result of this experience. But teaching yoga is tough for me. It really is. I have to not only get over my fear of public speaking, I have to think on my feet, sequence the class in a way that accommodates and prevents injury; I have to inspire, challenge, and relax my students; cue breath, postures, and movements; be able to demo what I am teaching; watch the timing of each segment of the class; and find music that goes with the flow of the practice. It's the ultimate multi-tasking endeavor, and I thought I was the ultimate multi-tasker! 'Til yoga, that is.
But then something wonderful happens.
Because I've paid to learn this stuff, I have to stay there and get through it. And somehow I do. And then I feel an amazing sense of accomplishment, not necessarily because I aced the exam, so-to-speak, but because I completed the exam without tears, without seizing up, without complete failure. And that feels really good! Today I taught my first 60-minute class to my class partner Kelly, and although my sequence was a bit short, I got through it with no nerves, no major screw-ups, and some pretty positive feedback. Plus, Kelly is about three-to-four months pregnant, so getting the sequencing right for her situation was even more important...there's a baby in there counting on Kelly and me for a smooth, safe practice!
Day 2 Highlights
Quick highlights because even though the time stamp on this blog is early, by the time I've cooked, written, unloaded the dishwasher, written, and did ten other things while writing, it's now 10:40pm, and I've got to get to bed.
But then something wonderful happens.
Because I've paid to learn this stuff, I have to stay there and get through it. And somehow I do. And then I feel an amazing sense of accomplishment, not necessarily because I aced the exam, so-to-speak, but because I completed the exam without tears, without seizing up, without complete failure. And that feels really good! Today I taught my first 60-minute class to my class partner Kelly, and although my sequence was a bit short, I got through it with no nerves, no major screw-ups, and some pretty positive feedback. Plus, Kelly is about three-to-four months pregnant, so getting the sequencing right for her situation was even more important...there's a baby in there counting on Kelly and me for a smooth, safe practice!
Day 2 Highlights
Quick highlights because even though the time stamp on this blog is early, by the time I've cooked, written, unloaded the dishwasher, written, and did ten other things while writing, it's now 10:40pm, and I've got to get to bed.
- Pranayama (breathing) exercises—We went through several today, but my very favorite new breathing exercise is Bumblebee Breath (Bhramari). The beauty of this exercise is the wonderful vibrations it creates when you have a big group doing it. It has the same effect as an OM, yet is less intimidating. Basically, you inhale, then while exhaling, you hum. In our practice today, we did Bhramari with a class of about 20-25 people. The sound was amazing! Then at the end of the day, we sat back-to-back with our class partner and did it again, this time feeling the vibration and connection to our partners through our backs as well. Such a cool sound and feeling. I can't wait to introduce this in my own future classes.
- In-depth assists—There are many of us in class who are afraid of assists, afraid to put our hands on people, whether it's because we don't want to hurt anyone, don't know what to do, or just don't want to touch anyone. Dolly showed us assists for many popular asanas, and we practiced each one with our partner. It helped me immeasurably. I'm really beginning to feel my fear of being in close proximity to strange bodies starting to melt away. I feel sorry for the people who assist me in practice, however. I'm such a profuse sweater...there's just nothing I can do about it. When I'm in a room that's 85 degrees, and I'm doing my seventh vinyasa with Chaturanga, and my heart is pumping, I just drip sweat. Poor Dolly comes by to assist or deepen a stretch, and I'm slicked down like a greased pig! But I digress...
- Christina's Yama/Niyama paper—We had to write a one-page paper about the yama and niyama that is most prevalent in our lives now. Christina wrote about how years ago, she studied yoga and really wanted to teach, so she auditioned for a teaching position, and the studio owner she auditioned for told her she should consider doing something else! After that, Christina said she quit practicing yoga for two years, and hated the thought of it. Who could blame her? Eventually, she forced herself back into a class, fear, hatred, and all, and started practicing again, and is now teaching and working on her certification. I was just stunned by her paper, by the resolve it takes to be shot down while pursuing your dream, then find the strength to believe in yourself enough to keep trying. To see Christina practice...I don't know how on earth anyone could have told her she shouldn't teach because she has a beautiful practice and a lot of grace. I know nothing about Christina, outside of what she has shared in class, but I do know this: She is my hero. What she's overcome takes a hell of a lot of courage. Bravery of the big, brass kind. Good for her!
Thursday, April 26, 2007
Yoga Teacher Training, Day 1, Module 2
I made it through day one of my second yoga teacher training module...and the knees are feeling OK! Of course, I iced them in and after class, and I pulled way back in my practice, but who cares! If I can just make it through the next five days and not injure them further, I'm golden. A few more weeks off and I think they'll be back to normal.
It's so nice to be back to yoga and to practice with Dolly. Personally, I've missed her and yoga, but now that I'm teaching the kids, practicing is more important than ever—I've got to be able to bring them a fresh and interesting class every other week, and it's hard when you're a new teacher and not practicing or being exposed to new ideas in the interim.
I was thinking today while in class that I'm so glad I decided to just jump in and start teaching the kids with no experience. Even teaching my tiny classes has helped me immeasurably in teacher training exercises. I feel much more confident and teaching is just a teensy bit easier. And chanting and OMs...I could almost care less if I suck or not. Because I know life goes on with or without my shaky OM, and that is a great feeling. I really owe my progress (at least mentally) to the kids. They've given me the freedom to explore my teacher side and put myself out there without fear of judgment. I've also had to face my own fears doing inversions in yoga in order to show them asanas that channel their energy and keep them engaged. That's not to say that I've even come close to mastering handstand or Pincha Mayurasana (Forearm Balance)...BUT...there was a time that I couldn't even do handstand at the wall. So I am making progress as well, and that always feels good.
Now that I'm back in yoga after having been off for the first time since I got into it last year, it has become more obvious than ever that I found yoga at exactly the time in my life when I would need it most, when its effects could be most profoundly realized. They say absence makes the heart grow fonder—and it does—I've missed the cathartic feeling of a good practice like crazy. But absence from yoga also makes the heart grow colder. I've noticed (and I'm sure the people closest to me have noticed) that these weeks away from my practice have yielded a bitter, complaining, self-absorbed person. The attitude change certainly isn't without reason, for there are myriad. However, now that I've practiced a few times in the last week, I can see that yoga is a gift that has arrived at my doorstep just in time, as I am preparing to act upon some pretty damn big decisions in my life, and the one thing I know will keep me sane through all of it is yoga. It levels me out physically, and the ethical guidelines of yoga make me a more spiritual, more conscientious person. I can see now that finding yoga when I did has opened up a new path in my life that I never, ever foresaw—and definitely wasn't making plans for. Now if I can just continue going with the flow, not cowering in the face of fear, I know I will find myself in a new place brimming with contentment and possibility.
It takes courage to change a routine, to evaluate, to question, to do the thing that is not the norm. I've been going with the motions for years. I think I'm finally finding the courage I need to look at my life and make it what I really want it to be. It's scary and exciting at the same time—the thought of taking a huge risk is utterly terrifying to me. But you know what? It's my life. And it's high time I lived it.
It's so nice to be back to yoga and to practice with Dolly. Personally, I've missed her and yoga, but now that I'm teaching the kids, practicing is more important than ever—I've got to be able to bring them a fresh and interesting class every other week, and it's hard when you're a new teacher and not practicing or being exposed to new ideas in the interim.
I was thinking today while in class that I'm so glad I decided to just jump in and start teaching the kids with no experience. Even teaching my tiny classes has helped me immeasurably in teacher training exercises. I feel much more confident and teaching is just a teensy bit easier. And chanting and OMs...I could almost care less if I suck or not. Because I know life goes on with or without my shaky OM, and that is a great feeling. I really owe my progress (at least mentally) to the kids. They've given me the freedom to explore my teacher side and put myself out there without fear of judgment. I've also had to face my own fears doing inversions in yoga in order to show them asanas that channel their energy and keep them engaged. That's not to say that I've even come close to mastering handstand or Pincha Mayurasana (Forearm Balance)...BUT...there was a time that I couldn't even do handstand at the wall. So I am making progress as well, and that always feels good.
Now that I'm back in yoga after having been off for the first time since I got into it last year, it has become more obvious than ever that I found yoga at exactly the time in my life when I would need it most, when its effects could be most profoundly realized. They say absence makes the heart grow fonder—and it does—I've missed the cathartic feeling of a good practice like crazy. But absence from yoga also makes the heart grow colder. I've noticed (and I'm sure the people closest to me have noticed) that these weeks away from my practice have yielded a bitter, complaining, self-absorbed person. The attitude change certainly isn't without reason, for there are myriad. However, now that I've practiced a few times in the last week, I can see that yoga is a gift that has arrived at my doorstep just in time, as I am preparing to act upon some pretty damn big decisions in my life, and the one thing I know will keep me sane through all of it is yoga. It levels me out physically, and the ethical guidelines of yoga make me a more spiritual, more conscientious person. I can see now that finding yoga when I did has opened up a new path in my life that I never, ever foresaw—and definitely wasn't making plans for. Now if I can just continue going with the flow, not cowering in the face of fear, I know I will find myself in a new place brimming with contentment and possibility.
It takes courage to change a routine, to evaluate, to question, to do the thing that is not the norm. I've been going with the motions for years. I think I'm finally finding the courage I need to look at my life and make it what I really want it to be. It's scary and exciting at the same time—the thought of taking a huge risk is utterly terrifying to me. But you know what? It's my life. And it's high time I lived it.
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